Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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