You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
