scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
