I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Randomize