Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
