Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
