By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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