if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
