Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
