So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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