and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
