i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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