yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
