Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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