so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize
