walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
