Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
