She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
