either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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