I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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