we're blogging at a bar
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
