porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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