he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
