she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
How external is "for external use only"?
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
