Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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