Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
