I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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