Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
