# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
My dick has a subreddit
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
