we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
