Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
