Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I have aggressive nipples.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Randomize
