As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Blood and glitter go together right?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
