So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
