Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
