break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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