Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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