I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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