? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize