so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize