Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
