no. you can't hotbox the world.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
pop tarts are not kleenex
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize