I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
