HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
