Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize