seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
