Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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