There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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