I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
