and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
