what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
